Open letter to Conservative Anglicans looking to convert to Roman Catholicism

Dear Conservative Anglicans considering the Catholic Church,
I'm sure you've received the invitation from our Pope to join up with the Catholic Church by now. I hear things have been getting a little "nutty" over with the Episcopalians these days. First women priests and bishops, then an openly gay bishop. Clearly these moves have created quite a bit of controversy in your church and have offended your conservative sensibilities. But before you take Benedict up on his offer, there are some things I think you should know about us Catholics.

While it's true that the Catholic Church has been pretty clear about several of the issues that are of concern to you, things might actually not be as cut-and-dry as you are hoping. Sure, we aren't allowed to have women priests, and we don't bless gay marriages or allow openly-gay people to serve as clergy (or receive communion for that matter), but I think that you should be aware of another long-standing Catholic tradition: ignoring Rome.

U.S. Catholics have been ignoring Rome for a long time on a whole host of issues, like birth-control and abortion. And in our local parishes, we've been breaking all kinds of rules: forming gay catholic groups (who even serve as Eucharistic ministers at Sunday Mass), and letting women speak from the altar, most notably. We even have splinter groups that ordain women. So, you see, if you're looking for a safe haven for your conservative sensibilities, you may not get what you're hoping for in the Catholic Church. Many of us are "reform minded" too. Benedict may not be particularly keen on being ignored though, which is why he's started some investigations into our American nuns and extended that invitation to you all — hoping to stem the tide of "liberal" ideas in our own church. Besides, I'm guessing you might feel a little bit insulted by Benedict's efforts to have you "swim the Tiber" in order to poach both your soul and your pocketbook. So, you see, we are nearly as rife with the same controversies and liberal/conservative battles that you might be hoping to opt out of.

I'd really consider toughing it out with your fellow Episcopalians/Anglicans if I were you; the grass really isn't greener or more conservative on the local parish level in the Catholic Church. Seriously.
Respectfully,
Anima Sola

Slowly I turn...

I just deleted a very LONG blog about my "Las Vegas baggage," realizing that the details are all far too personal to share in this forum. But needless to say, "Las Vegas" has become my "Niagra Falls." Just mention it and I'm angry, edgy and combative. Acknowledging that this is all mostly irrational (and part unfortunate past experiences) is (hopefully) half the battle, and one day, I hope to truly let it all go.

A work in progress

It's been a busy summer and I've found that spending time outdoors really helps me to cope with the stresses of life. I think it's been a tough time for most people we know (at least financially), but we're used to rolling with the punches around here. The kids are going to summer camp(s) and eating a lot of ice cream. Big M toyed briefly with becoming a vegetarian, but succumbed to the lure of Chicago hot dogs.

I found a few more Anima Sola references recently: first, the production company for the HBO series 'Big Love'shares the name; and second, I was watching this show i stumbled upon called 'Saving Grace' and the character has a door in her bedroom painted with anima sola. As in the movie Gothika, this seems to link up with a past history of sexual abuse.

Tonight I hope to meet up with my GLOS group and get some prayers focused toward one of our members that is battling cancer right now.

As for me, I've been working on my health and overall wellness, working hard and enjoying the sun when I can. I hope to acquire a custom hula hoop soon as trade I did with a friend for a logo design. In less than 2 weeks, The Nurse will graduate Nursing School. After she passes her boards, I'm sure we'll plan some sort of party. We're all excited to finally see the light at the end of the tunnel!

Irked

Doesn't it always seem that when life gets a bit more stressful, little annoying things seem to get magnified? Here's just a couple (yep, just two) of "annoyances" that have irked me lately:

1. Judge Sonia Sotomayor being criticized as potentially "too compassionate" and "emotional" or, conversely, as too "agressive, outspoken, and controlling." Of course, those are the standard "criticisms" of womankind going back as far as one cares to. You're either a bitch-with-a-capital-B or a weak and emotional crying mess who can't be given the authority to make important decisions. Grrrrrr.

2. Suburban straight-girl college culture. Admittedly, I know little of this from personal experience, but I've glimpsed a world through the eyes and stories of The Nurse that at once made me shudder, and be thankful that I attended art school in the big city. Apparently, gay-bashing and homophobia is alive and well at suburban colleges -- even in programs where the average age skews a bit higher. Twenty-six-year-old women routinely shun lesbian students for group projects, make obscene homophobic comments, and fear being called "lesbian" if they are too friendly with gay students. Do straight women generally harbor a paranoia that lesbian women are hitting on them if they are simply "nice"? Or that you will be considered gay-by-association?

My co-workers are all in the same age range (and 95% women), with The Nurse's classmates, and I have never yet experienced this phenomenon, so I have to blame the suburbs. I know other women — even straight girls who were "mistaken" for gay (short hair and tattoos perhaps? not enough pink?) — who have been accosted by total strangers. So I'm stayin in the city. Humpf.

waterfalls

"Life sure is a humdinger." That's what Delle used to say, quoting her wise auntie. The Nurse is in, well, nurse mode, but it's just a completely different thing when it's family. No machine. Waterfalls of tears. And reserves of strength you didn't know you had. Ah, I'd do just about anything to make it all better — but the simple truth is that I've got no control. None of us really do. I've got a shoulder to cry on and a lap to fall asleep on for an hour or so. And a whole lot of love for The Nurse and her family. I continue to be amazed to witness what the human soul can bear. Be kind to each other today.

Valleygirl

On my usual route getting the kids to the bus stop and then down the block to catch my train to work yesterday morning, I spied a yard full of hundreds of lilly of the valley which stopped me in my tracks. I just couldn't resist, so after looking around quickly, I crouched down and started picking them. Just a small handful to carry along to work with me. Ah, they are one of my favorite flowers, rivaled only by fellow May-bloomers, the lilac. The urban valley I live in — created thousands of years ago by Lake Michigan and melting glaciers — is the perfect habitat for these shade-loving beauties. Their sweet smell and dainty bell-shaped perfection made the walk down the used-condom strewn street a little more bearable. Take some time to smell the flowers today.

Life goes on....

Well hello there Anima Sola readers! It's been well over a month since I've posted anything, so I'll try to do a little update here of things that have been preoccupying me. I've thought about writing a few times, but as I so often do, I write it in my head and don't always manage to get to the keyboard. Anyway....Spring has finally sprung in Chicago and it's a glorious day — at least 70 today I'd say, with plenty of sunshine.

I'm getting into the groove at my new job; I had my "90-day Review" on Monday of this week and it was actually refreshing to hear some constructive criticism as well as praise. Overall, it was very positive and I was told what a good job I'm doing. After my review, I cleaned out the "job search" email folder that I'd been hanging on to — with well over 200 emails stored of jobs I'd applied for. A nice little cleanse.

Of course, becoming gainfully employed has not made each and every hurdle in life vanish — stumbling blocks and challenges are still a regular appearance. I have accepted that this is simply the nature of life. We are not in control, just along for the ride. We try to roll with the punches: stress, money woes, illness, death. And try to look around and see who is there with us as we face the darker moments. These are the people who matter. Live a good life and I believe you'll find lots of these people in your corner.

One of my latest guilty pleasures is Facebook. I've had fun reconnecting with long lost friends and keeping better tabs on people that I don't usually have daily contact with. The brief "status updates" are nice little check-ins with people who might otherwise slip through the cracks on most days.

This Saturday, Little M and J are making their First Communion, which we are all looking forward to. And this past Easter, The Nurse was initiated into the Catholic Church. It still sounds crazy to say that, because a part of me wonders how anyone can rationalize joining our crazy church, but then I realize that our community at St. G's is pretty darn special and unusual. There is an abundance of light there that really pulls people in. Perhaps it's greatest gift is that so many of the parishoners are deep thinkers who really have done the theological study and spiritual house-cleaning to be able to be Catholic on a local level, while resisting Catholic nonsense from the hierarchy. Anyway, The Nurse and I have really deepened our relationship by connecting spiritually and sharing a faith path, which means so much to me.

OK, this is getting a bit long, but I'll try to check in more often and write again about more topical stuff. I can't believe it's already mid-May and I'll be (choke, choke) 37 next week! How on Earth did this happen?